t minus. . .keep calm

keep calm7.30am: Came downstairs to find that my other half was in the front room on all fours.

“Alright, Rach?”

“Yes darling. Just some mild back pain.”

“…’normal back pain’ or ‘coming and going’ kind of back pain…?”

“I’m not sure”

“…’really not sure’ or ‘sort of not sure’…?”

“I don’t know, really”

“…’don’t know’ in what kind of a way…?”

“In a really, really don’t know kind of ‘really don’t know’ kind of way. I REALLY don’t fucking know.”

“…what does that mean, exactly…?”

etc.

11am: Nothing. Obviously just “normal back pain”…

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